Litigation is counterproductive, costly, and psychologically harmful to the families involved. The process of going to court forces partners who've lived together and shared their lives to become adversaries. Driven by a "winner-take-all" mind set, the parties become competitors in what they increasingly believe is a battle for control over their property and children.

Court battles are expensive, and the participants often squander their precious resources attempting to gain an advantage at a time when circumstances clearly indicate a need to reduce spending in order to stretch finances. 

Unfortunately, the combatants scarcely notice the psychological price they and their children have paid until the legal process has long ended.  Only then can the effects of prolonged anxiety and rage be observed as depression and disturbances in the ability to have healthy interpersonal relationships.

By comparison, mediation and collaborative law are positive approaches to reaching agreements that focus on containing the financial and psychological costs involved in reaching resolution of legal issues.  Each offers unique advantages dedicated to preserving relationships, maintaining dignity, and avoiding unproductive court battles.

Mediation and collaborative law encourage cooperation, seeking mutual solutions which benefit all parties.  Participants maintain the opportunity to control their own lives.  Financial consultants such as accountants and planners can be included, as can psychological experts, as necessary, to assist the parties in making sound financial and personal decisions. 

Whichever approach is chosen, by working constructively, each person preserves his or her dignity, and the relationship between the parties is strengthened, allowing them, should they have children, the ability to coparent in the years ahead.
 

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